A ‘beautiful' misunderstanding

As human beings, we are always quick to respond or react to the external environment, especially when there are threats or for survival's sake.  However, sometimes we are overly sensitive and that brings about misunderstandings and communication blockages.  Our minds are stuck on the ‘hurt feelings,' instead of clarifying the issue properly. 

The Incident

‘long face.'  I could sense that there was something wrong, so he reluctantly told me the ‘story.'  He said a policeman had delivered a ‘notice' for him to go to the police station for an interview.  The policeman said that our neighbor had called them because they saw a thief climbing over their wall, and he also mentioned our young people who may have been suspects, even though he could not identify the thief.  Thus, the police needed our church-in-charge to clarify the issue.   Actually, our neighbors along the street are mostly rich people or expatriates; our church building is very ‘ordinary' as compared with theirs.  My first reaction was to be quite ANGRY that the police had acted so fast to assume that we were the suspects when the neighbor did not have any evidence.  I thought maybe the police were frightened to provoke the VIPs, and thus they would rather make trouble for us.  I suggested Lim call Chris because he is the pastor-in-charge and also a ‘foreigner.'  I already assumed the neighbor was the ‘bad guy' and the policeman was the ‘wicked guy,' and of course, we were the ‘victims.'

The Process

Most of the students also talked about the incident, and some contacted their relatives who work in the police office.  Nevertheless, I had a struggle in my heart whether we should judge others because they are not ‘nice' to us or even make trouble for us.   I didn't want our students and Lim to label them either.  Therefore, during our meeting, I raised up that issue for discussion to see how we should react and practice what the Bible has taught us.  Of course, ‘love your enemy' was one of my main topics.  We may not be able to ‘love' them but at least we should ‘respect' them because all of us are sinners in front of God.  At the end of the meeting, I asked the students to pray for Lim and Minea (they would meet the police the following day), for their courage and peace in their hearts.  I also encouraged Lim that he need not worry about what to say, because the Holy Spirit would guide them, as the Bible says.  Lim was still anxious anyway, and he could not sleep all night long.

The Consequence

I called Minea the next morning to see how things were going.  He answered with an ‘easy' tone that the interview only lasted minutes.  All our anxieties were actually a BIG misunderstanding.  The neighbor had not called the police to accuse us; instead he just asked the police also to remind us to be careful because there are always young people coming and going at our church.  The police also expressed their opinion that our church did not have any ‘bad' record and they believed our members are ‘good' people too.  All our struggles and fears only drained our energy for nothing at all.

A Good Lesson

I laughed at myself and felt quite ridiculous over my teaching with the hidden agenda to solve the problem that never existed.  Our imagination always confuses reality and prohibits us from having proper communication and clarification of the issue.  We usually over-react with a defensive attitude rather than a prayerful heart to face different situations.  ‘Quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to get angry' is probably the safe way to treat all matters.

Prayer points

1. Chris has become the new Field Supervisor - may God grant him the strength and wisdom to lead the mission ministries with the local pastors and leaders

2. Pray for the newly elected mission district committee members that we can work together in unity to glorify God's name

3. Pray for the development projects such as fish ponds, piglet raising, chicken raising, plantations, microfinance, saving plans, sewing, painting and the like at our different churches and childcare centers

4. Pray for the participants of the Youth camp and Adults camp in April. May God revive and restore their spiritual lives

5. Many people will go back to their home towns for Khmer New Year's vacation in April. May God grant them the courage to say ‘no' to the Buddhist ceremonies in an appropriate way

6. May God grant me strength to follow up the minutes and matters after the annual meeting

You have knowledge of this, dear brothers. But let every man be quick in hearing, slow in words, slow to get angry; For the righteousness of God does not come about by the wrath of man. (James 1:19-20)

Davis Lam

Cambodia Mail Address: P.O Box 602, Phnom Penh, Cambodia